I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize