Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
