Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I could fuck to npr.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
