Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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