I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
