great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
