He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
