Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
