i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
