"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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