she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
