So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
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