I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
So apparently I’m into choking now
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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