You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
false alarm, still single
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
