pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
