he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
