My brain says no but my pants say off.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Randomize