I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
