So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
