oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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