I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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