Those balls look pretty dangerous.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize