So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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