You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
