wake up i wanna do it froggy style
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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