just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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