Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
