I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
