I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
