at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
