You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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