so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Randomize
