Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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