This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
