Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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