Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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