But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
