Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize