I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
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