I puked a lego.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I lost the right to judge tonight
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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