its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
