i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
