What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
