Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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