is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
is it fun? or sober?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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