There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
