2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
