Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
operation harelip BJ is a go
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Randomize
