It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
