where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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