maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
