We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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